Where’s Mommy?

My wife loves taking pictures—and she’s really good at it. She doesn’t just snap photos; she finds the right shots.

We have a TV called The Frame. She uploads her photos and creates rotating slideshows with different transitions and themes. Honestly, it’s one of the best purchases we’ve ever made.

Recently, she shared a story about our soon-to-be three-year-old granddaughter, Remi.

One of Amy’s favorite photos popped up on The Frame. Remi, about 15 months old at the time, was standing at Serenity Point—the southernmost tip of Topsail Island, North Carolina. The picture showed the beach stretching out in every direction, and Remi alone in the center of the shot.

No one else was visible.

Remi looked at the picture and asked, with a little concern,

“Where’s Mommy?”

Amy said, “She’s there—she’s just not in the picture.”

Remi paused… then, with a little more edge, asked again,

“But where’s Mommy?”

Amy explained again.

And immediately heard,

“But… where’s Mommy?”

Her three-year-old brain couldn’t process the feeling of aloneness she was experiencing. Everyone was there—but they weren’t visible.

Remi’s challenge wasn’t reality—it was peripherals.
Context. Perspective. What she couldn’t see, she couldn’t believe.

And we all have these same peripherals.

In leadership, relationships, and self-discipline, I bring years of experience, research, and context. Sometimes I forget that what’s clear to me isn’t always clear to others.

So here’s the question:
Are people fully understanding your directions, your teaching, your expectations?

That’s the peripheral gap—and it’s where small misunderstandings turn into big arguments… or worse, quiet non-confrontations that simmer beneath the surface.

So how do we close the peripheral gap?

Speak with clarity and brevity.
Resist assumptions.
Check for understanding.
And be patient when others don’t see what you see.

And if you’re the one feeling unclear—speak up.
Repeat back what you heard.
Ask questions.
Be positively assertive so you’re looking at the same picture.

When we eliminate the peripheral gap, we stop talking past each other—and start moving together, aligned, engaged, and growing.