Above the Line

One of the most impactful lessons I’ve ever learned came in the form of a question.

Are you above the line or below the line?

Simply put, the answer to this question defines our current state of mind.  Are we being proactive in our words, and, consequently, in our actions? If not, this is a great question to ask. Because the answer tells us why we’re negative, unhappy, filled with worry and losing. We’re below the line.

How about winning? This requires a winning mindset, which is above the line.

Let’s flesh this out.  Below the line is a victim mentality.  This is also called “playing the victim.”  Playing the victim is a choice, not a result. Webster defines playing the victim this way:

Victim playing (also known as playing the victim, victim card, or self-victimization) is the fabrication of victimhood for a variety of reasons such as to justify abuse of others, to manipulate others, a coping strategy, or attention seeking.

When we are below the line, we are acting upon an acronym – B.E.D.: blame, excuse, and denial.  If you choose to play the victim, you are typically modeling one or all of those three behaviors.  Consequently, you have “made your bed, and now must sleep in it.”  And sleep in it you will until you choose a proactive mindset.

Onto above the line.  The acronym here is O.A.R. – with an oar in a boat, you control progress.  Oar is ownership, accountability, and responsibility. That’s the ticket! When we choose this, we are not victims. We are victors.

Same circumstance, different mindset, and still a choice.

This is not about total control, but it is about controlling what we can, and by owning it, we are empowered.  If we are below the line, it only gets worse because we have no influence or control. We have rescinded those options.

Let’s be above the line in all things. Of course, we’ll dip down at times. Just don’t stay there.  Choose to be above the line. And when you’re not, get there.